Learning, changing and growing

For the past year I have been working outside the classroom, and hopefully I have been making some sort of [positive] difference to the way things have been operating within the faculty.

Of late I have been restless though.

I do miss the classroom, and not just in the fleeting “oh wow, this really sucks I wish I was back there doing that” but more in the “I wish I was doing some of these really cool things myself and not just designing them” but design them I do.

One of the greatest challenges I have had over recent months, has been the frustration of not being able to do it myself.

To know how cool the things are, what the potential of what we are building is, but to not be able to actually get in on the ground and teach is proving to be one of the biggest challenges of my job. I don’t want to lose that particular skill set – and yet, I don’t think that there is the potential for me to do what I want to do in the online space at the moment.

I am having to learn to live vicariously through others. I am having to change my thinking about how I feel about that. I am having to grow a new appreciation for the people who are able to actually do the things I design.

I need to sound less bitter about it all. But perhaps that is a thought for another day.